Gospel discipline

A man may easier see without eyes, speak without a tongue, than truly mortify one sin without the Spirit (John Owen Overcoming Sin and Temptation p80).

If this is true (and it is), then all of parental discipline centers upon the Gospel. The only way to deal with our children in discipline is through the Gospel. Not to make the Gospel the center is demand those without eyes to see, or those without tongues to speak.

Does this mean that until our children close with Christ we cannot discipline? On the contrary, it means that every encounter of discipline brings us to the Gospel, both before and after a child has trusted Christ. Before conversion, we tell our children that the requirements of obedience are not lowered because they are unable to obey; instead, forgiveness is offered to the disobedient, and power for obedience is tendered to those who repent and depend on Jesus! Thus we censure the sin, and require obedience without the illusion that they can do what is required apart from Christ. We embody the Law that is the guardian to direct them to Christ.

Once they have embraced Jesus for forgiveness, and reconciliation with the Father, the Gospel continues its central place in parental discipline. Every time we confront our children on their sin, it is a reminder that only in the Gospel is there forgiveness for the wicked and power for repentance. We press our kids to trust Christ now to deliver from sin by yielding to Him, and to trust Him to restore our fellowship through His forgiveness. So we are humbled, and He is exalted; we receive mercy and grace, and He makes us holy.

This is how our kids see that the Gospel is not just a ticket out of hell. They see that day in and day out, this is the Good News by which we live now. He who saves us from hell also delivers from sin. He is everything!