Can I have this please?

Elisabeth found an appealing looking can in the grocery store with a cartoon drawing on it, and brought it to Mommy.

"Mommy, can I have this please?" (She remembered her manners.)
"No, sweetheart, that's dog food."
"But I want it!" (Manners fading . . .)
"Sweetheart, that food is for dogs."
"But I like it!" (Good-bye manners.)

Clearly the advertising people missed their market on this one.

Changing seasons

Elisabeth found a brilliantly red tree!

E-X-I-T . . . exit!

Today Elisabeth picked up a book and read, "E-X-I-T . . . exit!" Rebecca and I looked at each other to ask, "Did you teach her that word?" and we both shrugged our shoulders at the same time.

I don't think we're far from being frequently surprised by the words she can decode.

Family walk

Elisabeth often asks to go on a family walk, which not infrequently looks like this.

Do you know why I like my church?

Overheard, talking with Grandmummy:

"Do you know why I like my church? I like it because of the people."

What a great reminder of how the church represents Christ to the youngest among us.

Why do we "repent"?

Last week I was doing catechism questions with Elisabeth from My First Book of Questions, and came to the question, What does it mean to repent?

After we had discussed the question and answer, I asked Elisabeth, 'Why do we repent?', to which she promptly responded,

"To get dessert!"

Earlier that evening at the table, she had had a bad attitude, and I had told her that it needed to change if she was going to join us for dessert. She changed her attitude, and finished her food - and clearly internalized the reason for her repentance. Her transparent answer showed what many of us exhibit: no hatred of sin or desire to be done with it. Yet that very honesty provides the opportunity for true repentance to occur.

The Plymouth Thanksgiving

I'm terrible about finding good books to help Elisabeth understand holidays. I always wait until the last minute, and then find the library shelves empty of quality literature. However, this time there was still The Plymouth Thanksgiving on the shelves. Though it is a long read for Elisabeth, it does a great job of setting the context of the first Thanksgiving, based on William Bradford's diary. I learned a lot in reading it!

Happy Thanksgiving!

That lady is not being loving . . .

Elisabeth was just reading a book with her aunt Haley. On opposite pages of the book, loving and unloving characters were contrasted, and Elisabeth observed:

"That lady is not being loving, but she is pretty!"

Already at 3, she is noticing the things that people value: appearance, performance, and virtue. How I want her to value them in the right order!

Overcoming Sin and Temptation

When I arrived home from my travels last weekend, I told my wife, "I finished Overcoming Sin and Temptation!" (It is the book that I completed, and not the struggle!)

I first read John Owen at full length in The Glory of Christ, and found the experience to be both challenging and richly rewarding. In all honesty, I would say that Overcoming Sin and Temptation is just as rewarding as The Glory of Christ, but (at least for me) more challenging reading.

So why tackle 407 pages of small print, precise language and archaic syntax? Owen has such a clear view of the glory of Christ, the nature of the Gospel, and how to wage war on indwelling sin that on almost every page I was struck with fresh insight. On the very subject Owen notes:

"Growing in notions of truth without answerable practice is another thing that indwelling sin makes use of to bring the souls of believers unto a decay. . . . By this means, from humble, close walking, have many withered into an empty, barren, talking profession. . . . And generally this is so when men content themselves, as was said, with the notions of truth, without laboring after an experience of the power of them in their hearts, and the bringing forth the fruit of them in their lives, on which a decay must needs ensue" (p386).

He did not intend people to read his writings just to get insight; in fact he saw it as potentially destructive! Rather he wrote a theological treatise on how to kill that which can take what is good and make it deadly to us. There are few authors that I have found that so successful navigate the course to faithful doctrine and faithful practice. It would seem that this very reality is the reason that Owen wrote: there was much true profession without answerable practice, and much falling away, even in the midst of true doctrine:

"This is indwelling sin. So wonderfully powerful, so effectually poisonous it is, that it can bring leanness on the souls of men in the midst of all precious means of growth and flourishing. It may well make us tremble, to see men living under and in the means of the gospel, preaching, praying, administration of the sacraments, and yet grow colder every day than others in zeal for God, more selfish and worldly, even habitually to decline as to the degrees of holiness which they had attained to." (p370)

Those are sober words; and yet Owen is convinced that through the Gospel we are given everything we need for life and godliness, which he presses on believers with tremendous force.

It is this reality, the insidious power of sin and the glorious power of the Gospel, that makes such difficult reading worthwhile. After reading Owen, I see how trifling vast swaths of contemporary Christian literature (and my own writing!) are. We simply don't have the acquaintance with indwelling sin, or the Gospel, that Owen had. So, from three centuries ago, he offers timely warnings, and powerful counsel.

I can't escape from commenting on how I read Owen as a parent. I no longer read simply for myself; all of my reading is for my family as well as myself. I have found no one better (yes, I think he is even more helpful than Jonathan Edwards) for treating the subtleties of our hearts, and applying the gospel remedies. Dozens of times in the course of reading this book (which has been at least six months), I have been corrected in my parenting, though Owen rarely makes direct references to the responsibilities of parents. In fact, I think someone should apply Owen's theology (which is simply careful, practical, Biblical systematics) to child-rearing. Any takers?

Tying her shoes

This week, Elisabeth insisted that she could tie her own shoes. In some sense, I think she was right.

Parenting in the Pew

Our Sunday school class has been reading Parenting in the Pew by Robbie Castleman, as a discussion-starter for parents.

In this sphere, I think it succeeds. Castleman raises some of the major issues of teaching children to worship, and offers some of her own experiences for insight into how to do it. I must admit that it made me much more conscious of how I was leading Elisabeth into worship last week in our Sunday service - and exposed a number of my bad habits. This book is great for getting parents (and others) thinking actively about how we teach our children to worship Christ.

I wouldn't, however, commend this book as the How to of teaching children to worship. Many of her examples are historically and culturally bound, and don't translate perfectly to other circumstances. I don't think that these qualities are reasons not to recommend the book, just words of fair warning for what you will find.

If anyone has recommendations of books that provide helpful recommendations of how to, please share!

Honey for a Child's Heart

Where The Read Aloud Handbook fell short, Honey for a Child's Heart excels. It commends the value of literature for capturing the imagination and shaping character far more than the Handbook. Whereas Jim Trelease sees reading (aloud and silently) as the crux of education, Gladys Hunt presents them as the crucible of character formation.

Like the Handbook, Honey is divided into two parts: expository text, and literature recommendations. The entire book is shaped by this conviction:

"You cannot bully people into appreciating what is true and good and beautiful." (p95)

The necessary corollary is that parents have the responsibility for winsomely presenting what is good, true and beautiful to their children. Hunt contends that literature is one great vehicle of achieving this end, and I think she succeeds in her case. I found myself remembering from my childhood many of the books she referenced, and I found myself longing to explore others that I missed out on.

I found her writing so compelling and inspiring that it made me want to homeschool not from any dissatisfaction with other means of education, but just because I want to have the privilege of soaking Elisabeth, and any other children God gives us, in great literature.

I'll leave you with her presuppositions (which I share):

"Underlying all of this discussion is my thesis that parents who read widely together with their children are going to be those who most influence their children, who have the largest worldview, who have an uncommon delight in what is good and true and beautiful - and an uncommon commitment to it. Sharing and feeling and talking together will come naturally. Books shared with each other provide that kind of climate." (p99)

The Jesus Story Book Bible

We're always looking for good children's Bibles. Right now, we are reading through The Jesus Story Book Bible right now (on loan from a friend, who has ours), and have to admit it is with mixed results. I should preface that by saying that we love The Big Picture Story Bible, which I have read through well over a dozen times with Elisabeth.

The Jesus Story Book Bible does a great job of prefiguring Christ through the stories of the Old Testament. That is the tremendous virtue of the book. The downside is that I wouldn't characterize it as great literature. Maybe after one or two really thorough revisions it could arrive at the place where all the words are well-chosen; but it is not there yet.

Now that I think about it, the reason that I so much prefer The Big Picture Story Bible to The Jesus Story Book Bible is the theological bias of each. The Big Picture takes the Kingdom of God as the central motif, and clearly tells the Gospel, with remarkable economy of language, through that lens. The Jesus Story Book treats 'God as lover' as the central motif, and often drifts into Sleeping Beauty type language (and in my opinion misrepresents the nature of God's desire for human beings).

So in my opinion, the scales are balanced on the Jesus Story Book: great prefiguring, but sloppy language and theology. In some ways far better than standard children's Bibles, but in some ways missing the mark. I highly recommend The Big Picture Story Bible for its rich literary and theological quality, and I'd encourage you to check out the Jesus Story Book and see if I'm overly critical!

The Read Aloud Handbook

Last weekend I had the privilege of traveling for business and pleasure. I took every advantage of the time in on the bus, in the airport, and on the plane to devour books that had been collecting dust for the past month or two. I was able to finish off several that I have been working on, and want to commend some of them to you.

The Read Aloud Handbook makes the case that parents reading aloud to children is the linchpin of successful education. Jim Trelease, very well acquainted with school policy and politics, and research on reading development, contends that reading to and with children throughout their years in the home fosters a love for reading, facility with ideas, critical thinking skills and open horizons.

For those who aren't convinced that parental reading plays a key role in their children's lives, I commend this book. For those who are already convinced, I commend the second half of the book, which is a treasury of recommendations for reading aloud. It will save you wading through many pieces of poor literature in an attempt to find good books for your kids.

In addition to his case for reading aloud, Trelease also offers creative ideas for establishing patterns of sustained silent reading, how to use the television to enhance literacy, and how to use audio books to enable children to enjoy literature that would prove difficult reading. His tips are practical and helpful, and I commend this book to parents and teachers alike.

Cute smile

Decoding!

For some time Elisabeth has associated letters and their (multiple) sounds, and has been able to recognize onset (beginning) sounds and end rhyme. However, this week in the bath she began really decoding for the first time.

Using her foam bath letters, she said that she wanted to spell 'Neva'. She was able to separate each of the sounds and identify the letter that produces that sound, and then put them in the proper sequence. Excited by her newfound skill, she decoded and spelled 'Zoe' (another good friend).

We're on the road to reading!

Destroying self-confidence

One of the great missions you have is to get self-confidence out of your children's hearts. . . . We teach children to despair of themselves and to flee to Christ, to flee for grace and mercy . . . (John Piper in Fathers Who Give Hope)

This is the litmus test of whether parenting is faithful to the Gospel. If the good news of Christ is not true, then Piper's words are nonsense; if the good news of Christ is true, then Piper's admonition is the only wise way to raise children.

Head and heart

"In James Stephen's The Crock of Gold, a wise philosopher says, 'I have learned that the head does not hear anything until the heart has listened, and what the heart knows today the head will understand tomorrow.'" (quoted in Honey for a Child's Heart)

This, I think, is why God communicates to us through literature - including the literature of the Bible.

Those first, formative years

"I heard my first stories in my mother's voice. A satisfactory substitute for that technique has yet to be devised, because most of who we are is decided in those first fleeting years of life before we ever see a school" (Richard Peck, Newbery Medal winner for A Year Down Yonder).

As a former elementary teacher, Peck's comment resonates with me. So much of a child's character, personality and readiness to learn are shaped in the precious early years of life. That is not to say that the current cannot be changed later in life; it is simply that the stream has gathered more force.

Can I have the chip?

This week in the parents' Sunday school class at our church, we discussed the sacraments and the role that they play in the spiritual formation of our children. After the class, in the worship service (in which we celebrate communion every week), Elisabeth whispered in my ear,

"Dad, can I have the chip?"

It was the first time she had ever shown interest in communion. A few minutes later she leaned into me again (still before communion) and whispered,

"I like our chips that are pointy; they're salty!"

Clearly the round wafers didn't measure up in her eyes.

Keener pleasures

"Books are no substitute for life, but a keener pleasure comes to life because of books" (Honey for a Child's Heart p21).

Feed your kids

As a teacher, I consistently told parents, "The most important thing that you can do for your child's education is to read with your child." I still think that is true. However, I now see that it is inadequate. It is like saying, "Feed your kids," without giving any nutritional advice. So one parent will take the children to McDonald's for every meal, while another will provide a healthy variety of foods. My exhortation to "feed your kids" is not helpful in the health of those children, because I didn't say anything meaningful.

A more helpful admonition than "feed your kids" is "feed your children a balanced diet of fruits, vegetables, protein, and fat in moderation." The parent who heeds my advice will be truly helping his or her children. In just the same way, rather than saying "read with your child," it is far better to say, "Read books with your children that communicate truth, goodness and beauty, that inspire your children to virtue."

However, just as a trip to the vegetable aisle might be daunting to the parent who is accustomed to exclusively processed food, so will a trip to the children's section of the library be frightening to the parent who is more comfortable in front of the television. For that reason, I think the good teacher or friend must go farther than commending the reading of great literature to provide examples of that literature so that the novice can learn to identify great literature by immersion in it.

In Honey for a Child's Heart, Gladys Hunt does precisely that: encouraging parents to take up and read great books with their children, describing the characteristics of such literature, and offering lists of such literature for each age of a child's life. She is a much better teacher than I, and I highly commend her book!

Well-chosen words

"Well-chosen words need only be few in number, but they help store away the pleasure of the adventure" (Honey for a Child's Heart p19).

One of the marks of the great books that I love to read to Elisabeth again and again is their brilliant economy of language. Clearly these authors are masters of language and image, like Kevin Henkes.

What a book does

That is what a book does. It introduces us to people and places we wouldn't ordinarily know. A good book is a magic gateway into a wider world of wonder, beauty, delight, and adventure. Books are experiences that make us grow, that add something to our inner stature. . . . Children don't stumble onto good books by themselves; they must be introduced to the wonder of words put together in such a way that they spin out pure joy and magic. (Honey for a Child's Heart p17)

These words from the first chapter of Honey for a Child's Heart capture my enthusiasm for introducing Elisabeth to great literature. Books can indeed be the gateway to worlds and experiences that will increase her capacity for delight, empathy and love. O how I want her to develop a love for great books!

Public reading of Scripture

On Sunday in church, we prayed for abatement of the California wild fires, and the Old Testament reading included Jeremiah 14:22.

Are there any among the false gods of the nations that can bring rain?
Or can the heavens give showers?
Are you not he, O Lord our God?
We set our hope on you,
for you do all these things.

The phrase "can the heavens give showers" hit me in the gut. To believe in the God of the Bible is to deny philosophical materialism (which maintains that events can be explained entirely in terms of material causes - like changes in temperature, pressure, humidity, etc.). Not only can the false gods not give rain, but the heavens themselves do not give showers; even the rains come from God. It is He who created the laws of nature, and He who establishes them and can overrule them at any time.

Thank God for the public reading of Scripture that overturns my assumptions, and teaches me to pray like I ought - and to raise children as I ought.

Our pumpkin

Listen to the Religious Affections

As I have mentioned before, I don't do as much reading as I would like to anymore, but I get to do a lot more listening.

This month one of my favorite books of all time (Jonathan Edwards' Religious Affections) is available for free from Christian Audio. For those who have been interested in it, but haven't had the stamina for reading, this may be a great way to get into it - on the commute, or while doing dishes!

HT: Justin Taylor

Where to buy your books

Does it matter where you buy books? Is book buying an action without social consequences?

Last week I ordered two books from Monergism and was reminded why I purchase from them. There are many titles that I could get less expensively from ChristianBook.com, but there is a dramatic difference between the way these two companies operate. Monergism is discerning in the titles it sells, because they realize that selling is an implicit commendation of content. By contrast, ChristianBook.com is indiscriminate in its title selection, and sells lots and lots of products that undermine the very message of the good news. (This is precisely what I expect of Amazon, which by its very mission is indiscriminate, not Christian Book Distributors.)

So I have put a link in my sidebar to Monergism that I would encourage you to check out - and use - to make purchases of Christian literature. By your purchases, you are establishing a discerning, wise and God-honoring organization.

(Incidentally, Monergism has many great resources outside of its bookstore, including many excellent mp3 sermons and lectures - for free!)