Lying to your children

It is easy to lie to your kids - especially at bed time. Recently we had some friends (and their children) staying with us. They put the kids to bed and came out to visit with us. When they did, the mother said, "I lied to the little one. I told her that I was going to the bathroom." The rationale is simple: The only way that I can leave the room without the child going into hysterics is to tell her I'm going to the bathroom and coming back.

Also recently friends of ours observed that their babysitter was lying to their daughter. She would say, "Yes, we'll do _____, after you've eaten your food." Then, when the girl had finished her food, the babysitter would not do what had been promised.

These two incidents reminded me just how tempting it is to lie to our children, particularly when it makes separation or compliance easier (at day care, nursery, or bedtime). But the fact is that our children will learn not to trust us. That is a price I am not willing to pay.