The artist at work

The Man who Walked Between Two Towers

This book is worthy of a Caldecott for its wonderfully illustration and well-told story. It seized my attention, as I was ignorant of this note in the history books. Mordicai Gerstein brings the story to life with wonderful suspense, clever twists, and a loveable, impetuous protagonist.

If you don't know who Philippe Petit is, this book is the best way to learn!

On Democracy

G. K. Chesterton and C. S. Lewis said that the doctrine of original sin is the basis of a democratic form of government – where power is spread out over the people – because it is the only reason we can give for not absolutely trusting a ruling elite. In other words, the best argument of democracy is not that men are good enough to govern themselves, but that men are so bad none can be trusted with absolute power. (John Piper, emphasis mine)

This small observation in John Piper's sermon on original sin in Romans 5 is a demonstration of just how important it is that the Gospel is the foundation for all of life. Our materialist friends (who believe that the material world is all that exists) may advocate for democracy loudly - but they will do so on entirely different grounds. Their assumption is that there is enough goodness in humanity that we can figure out how to work together. The Christian, like Lewis and Chesterton, arrives at democracy from entirely the other direction. Therefore it is absolutely imperative that as we raise our children we teach them the foundations of the Gospel so that they understand where we agree with others, and why we agree with materialists on democracy and yet come at it, and practice it, very differently.

In the Gardens again

We got so many good pictures in the gardens, that this is simply the next in the series.

Disability of dealing with temptations

I read the following last night, and was astounded how Owen's words 300 years ago speak so clearly to our present age in which many speak peace to those who are mortally wounded, and offer methods of healing totally incomensurate with the gospel:

The consideration of the present state and condition of the generality of professors - the visible evidences of the frame of their hearts and spirits - manifesting a great disability of dealing with temptations . . . This was seconded by an observation of some men's dangerous mistakes, who of late days have taken upon them to give directions for the mortification of sin, who, being unacquainted with the mystery of the gospel and the efficacy of the death of Christ, have anew imposed the yoke of a self-wrought-out mortification on the necks of their disciples, which neither they nor their forefathers were ever able to bear [cf. Acts 15:10]. A mortification they cry up and press, suitable to that of the gospel neither in respect of nature, subject, causes, means, nor effects; which constantly produces the deplorable issues [results] of superstition, self-righteousness, and anxiety of conscience in them who take up the burdent which is so bound for them. (Owen, John., "Overcoming Sin and Temptation." Ed. Justin Taylor and Kelly Kapic. Wheaton: Crossway. 2006 p41)

The Story of Ruby Bridges

I want my daughter to grow up to be like Ruby Bridges. From the time Elisabeth is old enough to understand (which probably comes around 6, the same age as Ruby is in the book ) I want her to have heroes like Ruby.

I taught for three years in a public school in which the student population was 99% black. I didn't stumble onto this book until my last year teaching - and when I did, I couldn't stop recommending it. How I wish that there were a thousand books like this one for young black children to devour!

This book is the story of a historic event in our nation's history: the first black child to attend an all-white elementary school. It is told by Robert Coles, who was personally acquainted with Ruby during this time of "integration", and captures brilliantly the fabric of the gospel that was so woven into this little girl's heart in her home.

Just writing this brings tears to my eyes. Every time I read it to my class, I cried. When I showed them the movie, I cried. My students asked me, "Why you crying?" and I would answer, "Because I want you to be like that." Not, "I want you to grow up to be like that," but "I want it for you in your childhood."

I cannot think of a non-fiction picture book that I would recommend more highly than The Story of Ruby Bridges. It is a breathtaking look at the power of the Gospel.

Move over Baskin Robins

Yesterday while we were out walking, Elisabeth turned to me and asked,

"Would you like hippo ice cream or rhinocerous?"

It looks like Baskin Robins stopped far short at 31 flavors when there are so many others to be had!

By the fountain

Twenty minutes to bedtime

Yesterday I got Elisabeth ready for bed, and wanted to give her a sense of when it would be bedtime. So I told her, "It is twenty minutes to bedtime." Elisabeth, always ready to haggle over numbers, said,

"No! Five minutes!"

If she's going to be effective in her haggling, she's going to have to master the value of numbers . . .

Then we can go in the 3

Yesterday Elisabeth and I went swimming in a pool in a friend's building. It was our first time there (and we were the only swimmers). At each end of the pool was the number 4 on a tile, indicating the depth in feet. I told Elisabeth that we were going to swim to the 4. So we swam to one end, and then back to the 4 on the other end. When it was nearly time to get out, Elisabeth said,

"We'll go to the 4 and then to the 3."

I was a bit puzzled as I couldn't see a 3 anywhere. But knowing that she is more observant than I am, I waited to find out what she was talking about. When we got out of the pool, I saw that there was indeed a 3 tile on the hot tub, indicating its depth. It had been out of view the entire time that we had been in the pool. Apparently Elisabeth had seen and noticed it as we were walking across the pool deck to get into the pool. I wish I was as observant as she is!

Our little scientist

Elisabeth used a magnifying glass and flashlight to examine this artificial tree!

You didn't give Bob a hug!

This week we had dinner with some friends at their home. When we got back to our apartment, we went through Elisabeth's bedtime routine, and I went into her room to pray with her before she went to sleep. As is usually the case, her little mind starts racing about how to delay bedtime. This time, her ploy was to start a conversation. When we finished praying, she said,

"You didn't give Bob a hug!"

In our farewells, Rebecca had given hugs to both our host and hostess, and I had hugged our hostess and shaken our host's hand. Elisabeth, the keen observer of culture noticed it - and was upset. Nothing escapes kids!

Natural and Logical Consequences

Recently I had an "Aha!" moment with regard to rewards. For some time I have been trying to sort out my feelings about rewards. What is their place? How do we keep them from being bribery? How do kids learn the intrinsic value of doing a thing?

I think the answers to some of these questions are bound up in the concepts of natural and logical consequences. A natural consequence is one that happens as the result of a child's thoughts, words or actions. For example, the natural consequence of a child running on a hardwood floor is slipping and falling. It is not the kind of thing that parent enforces. It is just what happens (and is the reason that we have rules about these sorts of things - to prevent accidents). A logical consequence is one enforced by a parent that has a sort of logical connection to the action. For example, if a child doesn't finish his homework, he can't watch television. In a logical consequence the parent presses the natural consequence. The consequences is deeply connected to the action. It has to do with using time responsibly, and thereby gaining leisure time. This is the consequence of which it is often said, "The punishment fits the crime."

How do natural and logical consequences bear on rewards? Logical consequences are both positive and negative. Elisabeth is well acquainted with one logical consequence: If she finishes her dinner, then she gets to eat dessert; if she doesn't finish her dinner then, she doesn't get dessert. She is learning that finishing one's task gains freedoms. The "reward" is a logical consequence. Likewise the logical consequence of putting one's shoes away immediately upon coming home is freedom to do other things rather than being summoned to put the shoes away. The logical consequence of keeping one's room clean is having freedom to do other things with one's time.

What I'm driving at is that if the reward attached to an action has a logical connection to the action, it reinforces the intrinsic value of the action and provides motivation. Using extrinsic rewards (such as getting a candy for cleaning one's room) sends the message that the natural consequences of cleaning a room are not sufficient reason. A more logical consequence for cleaning one's room would be freedom to use the computer; one has discharged responsibilities, and now has gained leisure.

Why do I think that this is important? From my experience as a teacher, I believe that children (unconsciously) treat extrinsic rewards that are not logically connected to an action as bribery or payment for services rendered. The value of the action is actually demeaned through these kinds of rewards. A wonderful example of logical rewards in my elementary classroom was something called "center time" which consists of self-selected learning centers that included art projects, books on tape, computers etc. The reward for completing one's work well and quickly was the freedom to pursue their own interests in learning. The kids were motivated and the value of the work was affirmed.

Now I'm looking more closely at how I can develop more logical rewards at home for Elisabeth.

Writing her name!

Yesterday Elisabeth wrote her name for the first time! She has been able to trace letters for some time, but hasn't had the patience to attempt freehand. Yesterday she was interested and had much more determination than I had expected. The picture on the right was her first attempt. (I modeled each letter, and then told her how to form it, but didn't touch her hand.) The one on the left was another attempt (in which the E is much better), but we only made it to the B.

Break, or Time out?

In our Sunday school class, we have been using a curriculum called Parenting is Heart Work. One of the many interesting recommendations that they make is to use a "break" instead of a "time out." They make this distinction: A time out is a punishment to be endured that has a set time frame; a break is an opportunity for a child to change his or her attitude and therefore does not have a set timeframe. A break, on their definition, functions like this:

A father tells his daughter to put on her shoes. She says, "No!" and stomps out of the room. The father addresses the situation by addressing the heart: "I see that you're upset. I think that you need to take a break to change your attitude. When you are ready, we need to have a conversation." Like a time out, the idea of a break is not for the child to go play games or watch TV. The break is in a place without those distractions where the child can think about her heart and her behavior. The child is responsible to stay in that place (or face further consequences) and then report back to the parent. If the child comes back still in a huff, she has to go back to the break until she can discard the attitude, admit she was wrong and ask forgiveness. Until the child comes to this point (changed attitude, admission of wrong and request of forgiveness) she doesn't get anything else. If she asks for something, the parent redirects the conversation to the problem at hand so that it can be resolved. Then the child understands that her attitude has broken the relationship; other things can't be had until the break is mended. What is at issue is not just the behavior that occurred, but the heart issue that precipitated it.

I really like the break concept in that it teaches children that discipline need not be punitive; rather it can be deeply restorative. Further, it shows them that behavior is just the tip of the iceberg. Finally, I like that it requires the child to be responsible for staying on the break, for thinking about her heart and actions, and for engaging in dialogue with the parent. I don't think that it is the "silver bullet" that makes parenting a breeze, but I do believe that it has a lot of merit.

Fall Flowers

We found fall flowers in beautiful bloom nearby, and Elisabeth checked them out.

Discarding one flotation device!

This week at swimming lessons Elisabeth did away with the foam noodle that she had been using for support under her arms. With a small foam float strapped to her back (and without holding onto Daddy!) she motored all over the pool!

It was a reminder to me of the importance of modeling. We arrived early for swim class and so Elisabeth watched a 3-year-old in a private lesson who had the float on her back and was swimming without the noodle. I think she saw her and realized, "I can do that!" And she did.

Another great book list

My sister-in-law put me onto two more great list of books to carry to the library: the Coretta Scott King Award list, and the related John Steptoe Award for new talent.

Since neither of these are available as pdfs, the best way to carry them electronically is using Avantgo.com, and making a custom channel.

Electronic Caldecott List

After carrying a paper list of the Caldecott Books, I've found a way to carry it that doesn't get thrashed in my backpack. Adobe offers a Portable PDF Reader that enables me to save this Caldecott List on my Palm (which I carry in my wallet, and so is always with me).

For others who use a Palm OS PDA, I highly recommend it.

On the Balance Beam

Elisabeth loves walking on "balance beams" and as a result is getting a much better sense of balance.