'Till it was all leavened

Moving to tumblon!

2008-06-25T10:21:00.004-04:00

For the past several months, I have been maintaining two personal blogs, this one, and (without any publicity) my tumblon blog. That time has come to an end, as I will now use the tumblon blog exclusively. Why am I making the switch now?

Integration.

Tumblon is integrated with Elisabeth's developmental milestones.
Tumblon integrates stories and photos (and soon video) in one service.

Security.

Tumblon has 3 tiers of security for every milestone, memory and photo: private, friends & family, and public. Now I don't have to be nervous about publishing because I control the content - and I can write for each audience.
Tumblon uses a static url (mine is http://scharf.tumblon.com). Registered friends see all the friends & family content, while unregistered folks see only the public posts.

There are lots of other benefits of tumblon over blogger, but these two are the reason that I'm making the move now. So, reset your feed readers to the new blog, and feel free to email me at leavened (a) gmail.com to request an invitation to see all of our friends & family content there.

For the sake of full disclosure: I am co-founder and community manager of tumblon, and so I'm very excited to share the service with family and friends. We are making many improvements, and adding many new features as we move toward a public beta (very soon), and then a public launch (in a few months). So you will get to see many of those improvements and features over the weeks and months to come. If there's something you think would make tumblon better, you can email me, or use the support email on any of the tumblon pages to let us know how to meet the needs of parents.

UPDATE (Nov 3, 2008): Our public beta is going well, and now includes video!

Art

2008-06-11T09:27:00.004-04:00

I love it when friends recommend good children's books. So I was delighted yesterday when my friend, Lauren, recommended Art to me.

Art is a masterful blend of simple text and simple illustration that unfolds the dynamics of artistic expression. Patrick McDonnell has produced a worthy piece of art in Art.

Good literature teaches more than we know

2008-06-05T22:46:00.000-04:00

"Good literature teaches more than we know. Example always speaks louder than precept, and books can do more to inspire honor and tenacity of purpose than all the chiding and exhortation in the world" (Honey for a Child's Heart p53)

The challenge for parents is to be well-acquainted with such a corpus of good literature that we can pull out the book, poem or short story to meet the hour.

"The orcs have been here"

2008-06-04T22:03:00.003-04:00

Families who share literature together have a rich history and vocabulary with which to communicate depth of feeling, as Gladys Hunt captures well:

"When we went to visit a favorite spot and saw that much of hat we remembered as beautiful had changed, our son said, 'The orcs have been here,' and we didn't need to say more." (Honey for a Child's Heart p76)

That expression alone captures for me the power of literary allusion.

Inconceivably a better condition

2008-06-04T12:13:00.000-04:00

If you can persevere through his tortuous sentence structure, John Owen's insight can take your breath away:

"A design in Christ shines out from [the Father], that was lodged there from eternity, to recover things to such an estate as shall be exceedingly to the advantage of his glory, infinitely above what first appeared, and for the putting of sinners into inconceivably a better condition than they were in before the entrance of sin. . . . To save sinners through believing, shall be found to be a far more admirable work than to create the world of nothing." (Communion with the Triune God, p195, 196)

Poetry

2008-06-03T11:24:00.005-04:00

For some reason, I never enjoyed poetry as a child (or at least I don't remember enjoying it). So now I find it strange that poetry speaks so deeply to me. Words like these, of James Russell Lowell, stir me deep within:

They are the slaves who fear to speak
For the fallen and the weak;
They are the slaves who will not choose
Hatred, scoffing and abuse,
Rather than in silence shrink
From the truth they needs must think;
They are the slaves who dare not be
In the right with two or three.

Hard core hymns

2008-05-23T21:39:00.002-04:00

For those who appreciated hymns with brutally honest words, here's another that rattles my cage, called Jesus, I my cross have taken:

Go, then, earthly fame and treasure,
Come disaster, scorn and pain
In Thy service, pain is pleasure,
With Thy favor, loss is gain
I have called Thee Abba Father,
I have stayed my heart on Thee
Storms may howl, and clouds may gather;
All must work for good to me. (igrace)

It takes courage to sing those words: "Go, then, earthly fame and treasure . . ." yet I don't know a better way to wean my heart of those things than to sing words like those in worship.

[The other five verses are just as potent, for those who are interested.]

More tulips

2008-05-20T13:11:00.001-04:00

The tulips are fading, but I hadn't yet posted this picture . . .

All that feeds my busy pride . . .

2008-05-17T11:12:00.000-04:00

In our family worship times, we have been singing Jesus Cast a Look on Me from the Indelible Grace 3 album. (Then we can sing along to the CD, as Matthew Perryman Jones is a much better guitarist than I am.) The second verse has been ringing in my ears:

All that feeds my busy pride
Cast it ever more aside
Bid my will to thine submit
Lay me humbly at thy feet

"Busy pride" is a good description of my pride. I need daily to pray and sing these words, and I pray that they will shape Elisabeth as she sings and hears them.

The privilege and responsibility of parenting

2008-05-16T10:13:00.003-04:00

I love reading with Elisabeth. That discovery has been one of the greatest joys of parenting. Gladys Hunt captures well my sentiments:

"Children and books go together in a special way. I can't imagine any pleasure greater than bringing to the uncluttered, supple mind of a child the delight of knowing the may rich things God has given us to enjoy. Parents have this wonderful privilege, and books are their keenest tools. Children don't stumble onto good books by themselves; they must be introduced to the wonder of words put together in such a way that they spin out pure magic and joy." (Honey for a Child's Heart p17)

I would nuance what she has said to state that it is the privilege and responsibility of parents to teach children to delight in God and His gifts. For she is surely right that children don't stumble onto good books by themselves. Yet that in no way negates or diminishes her point that it is a tremendous privilege to discharge this responsibility. Our job as parents is to enjoy the goodness, truth and beauty of God in all things, and to introduce our children to this delight. That is a gloriously happy responsibility.

Sunshine and Flowers

2008-05-16T08:46:00.000-04:00

Developing 'the taste buds of the mind'

2008-05-13T12:23:00.000-04:00

At the grocery store recently, I was appalled by one family's shopping cart. It was heaped high (quite literally) with all manner of processed food. I couldn't help thinking, "Those are going to be fat kids." Their parents, who are responsible for their health and well-being, are shaping their taste buds for life. Growing up on potato chips and sugar water will not help them savor the foods that are really good for them.

What may not be as obvious as a family walks through the grocery store is how parents influence their children's taste for truth, goodness and beauty. Gladys Hunt observes:

"Good books have genuine spiritual substance, not just intellectual enjoyment. Books help children know what to look for in life. Reading develops the taste buds of the mind as children learn to savor what is seen, heard, and experienced and fit these into some kind of worthwhile framework." (Honey for a Child's Heart p21)

A diet of 'junk food' literature cripples the mind and soul just as a diet of lousy food disables the body. If you're wondering how to build a balanced literary diet, the annotated book lists in Honey for a Child's Heart is a great place to start.

Well-chosen words

2008-05-12T12:17:00.001-04:00

"Every child ought to know the pleasure of words so well chosen that they awaken sensibility, great emotions, and understanding of truth. This is the magic of words - a touch of the supernatural, communication that ministers to the spirit, a true gift." (Honey for a Child's Heart p18)

Art on Top of the Met

2008-05-11T18:05:00.000-04:00

I can do it!

2008-05-10T15:42:00.001-04:00

Elisabeth has been timid to try this hanging aparatus, as it rotates with the weight of the child. Finally she tried it, and (not surprisingly) was just fine. She announced with glee, "I can do it!"

Rich language, or poverty-stricken vocabulary?

2008-05-10T15:12:00.005-04:00

Last night I was re-reading Honey for a Child's Heart (yes, again), and came upon this selection:

"The right word in the right place is a magnificent gift. Somehow a limited, poverty-stricken vocabulary works toward equally limited use of ideas and imagination. On the other hand, the provocative use of the right words, of a growing vocabulary, gives us adequate material with which to clothe our thoughts and leads to a richer world of expression." (Honey for a Child's Heart p18, emphasis mine)

In the phrase poverty-stricken vocabulary, I experienced precisely what Gladys Hunt was describing: 'provocative use of the right words.'

As I walk through our neighborhood, and scarcely hear a sentence without the f-bomb, I cannot think of a better description than poverty-stricken vocabulary. There is no question in my mind that words and imagination are tightly knit.

This is the cycle of poverty: language, imagination and life. To break that cycle, there must be a profound change in all three. Yet in order not to suck those leaving the cycle of poverty in to the whirlpool of greed, there must be conversion. The new words, imagination and life must be characterized by visions of the Kingdom and its King, and not visions of 'progress.' That is precisely the role that literature, and Christian literature in particular, can and should play.

Gardening

2008-05-07T22:48:00.001-04:00

Elisabeth tried her hand at gardening this week!

We love this kid

2008-05-07T19:46:00.001-04:00

Overheard at our house recently:

"Elisabeth, would you like ice cream or applesauce for dessert?"

"Applesauce, please, Daddy."

"Elisabeth, what would you like to listen to at bedtime?"

"Bach, please, Mommy."

Not a compelling vision

2008-05-02T11:42:00.002-04:00

A recent letter to parents from our principal closed with these words:

"Reading, writing and math are lifetime skills we should all continue to sharpen."

It struck me that those words, while true, are not at all a compelling vision of education. What teachers, to say nothing of children, get excited about the mechanics of reading and writing, or the ability to perform mathematic procedures? Those skills are the means to meaningful ends, and when they are employed to meaningful ends are exciting. Using math to solve a real problem provides satisfaction; using words effectively to persuade someone to stop littering is gratifying; reading literature that provides a compelling vision of what is good, true and beautiful is a delight.

I pray that we, as parents, would be gripped by a compelling vision of truth, goodness and beauty (rooted in the gospel) that shapes our understanding and pursuit of education - and our dialogue with those who are intellectual descendants of John Dewey.

What does "fear" mean?

2008-05-01T14:00:00.000-04:00

Recently I was reading with Elisabeth from a portion of the Bible that calls on the readers to "fear the LORD your God."

Elisabeth turned and asked me, "What does fear mean?"

I answered almost reflexively, "It means to honor and respect." But as soon as the words were out of my mouth I realized that I had spoken the same words that dissatisfied me when I was young. The fear of the LORD certainly entails honor and respect, but it also means something closer to the common meaning of that word (which is why we continue to translate it that way).

Does anyone have suggestions on how to explain the fear of the LORD to a 4 year old?

Sitting pretty

2008-05-01T11:59:00.001-04:00

Of course I couldn't let her take all the pictures.

My little photographer

2008-04-30T21:40:00.001-04:00

Elisabeth took this one!

Taking action

2008-04-29T11:56:00.002-04:00

For some time I have been on a mailing list for avaaz, an activist organization that seek to affect global policy through lobbying of various sorts. They craft their messages well enough to satisfy even me (I'm a terrible nit-picker) in pushing decision-makers toward responsible and sustainable policies.

So, first, I'd encourage you to check them out. Second, I'd commend this petition as one that tries to affect change in global food shortages by changing public policies (like encouraging westerners to burn food instead of oil).

Environmentally friendly parenting

2008-04-24T14:13:00.002-04:00

My friend Jennifer is blogging this week about environmentally friendly parenting. She has some very helpful and concrete suggestions. And although her target audience is admittedly moms, most of what she has to say here is just as germane to dads.

So read, reduce, and enjoy!

Lobbying for the intentional use of words and books

2008-04-23T22:24:00.003-04:00

I've been re-reading Honey for a Child's Heart for my work on tumblon. [I've been blogging more actively there than here.] I'm rediscovering why I loved it so much the first time. Here is one tidbit from Gladys Hunt:

"Every parent by words and choices furnishes the heart and mind of a child, for good or for ill. I am lobbying for the intentional use of words and books to influence a child in the best possible way. What do books bring a child? A recap is in order: a big world with all its possibilities - people to know and understand, places to imagine, eyes to see beyond the obvious, words to stretch the mind and heart, and a lasting stewardship of language used in the right way. (p101)

Sitting with tulips

2008-04-23T22:11:00.001-04:00

The tulips are in bloom!

The trickle up effect

2008-04-21T22:34:00.005-04:00

Lesslie Newbigin, explaining the theology of Augustine, states:

"Thus love creates order first in the family and among neighbors and then, by extension, in the city and the nation." (Foolishness to the Greeks p104)

Love creates order, beginning first in the family. Where parents love their children by calling them to love Christ, the proper order of all things is established: 'You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength.' Then the second commandment falls in place, 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.' As Augustine says:

"Consequently, since he is ordered to love his neighbour as himself, he advises his neighbour [and children] also to love God." (ibid. p104)

Thus, notes Newbigin, "It is love that creates justice."

As a parent and educator, I marvel at the divine wisdom of this 'trickle up effect.' It begins in the home, in every home, where faith works through love. Love establishes order in the home, by which justice reigns, and character is formed. Those who experience such love and justice in the home are there prepared, by faith, to love their neighbors. The neighborhood is thereby infected with the love and justice of God through faithful parenting. And as the leaven works through the dough of society, love for God creates order "by extension, in the city and the nation."

The establishment of justice in society is not distinct from, but must flow from, faith in Christ shown in love, beginning in the home. Of this justice, John Owen rightly says,

"The greatest mercies and blessings that in this world we are made partakers of, next to them of the gospel and the covenant of grace, come to us through this channel and conduit ['the proper work of magistracy' i.e. good government]" (Overcoming Sin and Temptation p352).

In this season where all eyes are on presidential candidates, it is wise to set our hands also to the work that we can do in the home that is the gospel way to the just governance of the next generation.

Leap forward in figrative drawing

2008-04-21T15:19:00.001-04:00

This is an enormous leap forward for Elisabeth in drawing what she sees! Until now, her drawings have consisted essentially of girls, flowers and rainbows. If you asked her to draw you somethinge else, you'd get a girl, a flower or a rainbow (or maybe all 3). Now maybe you'll get a mantid instead.

In Mom's boots

2008-04-21T12:35:00.001-04:00

Leaving the ghetto

2008-04-19T22:07:00.004-04:00

I'm re-reading Lesslie Newbigin's Foolishness to the Greeks, and am functionally blogging through it at gospel entrepreneurship, but can't resist posting a couple of quotes here as well.

"Christians can never seek refuge in a ghetto where their faith is not proclaimed as public truth for all." (p115)

Amen.

Back in the sandbox

2008-04-18T17:58:00.001-04:00

Yesterday was the first day of spring in the sandbox!

Discipline pays dividends

2008-04-17T22:09:00.004-04:00

Tonight I had a conversation with a friend in which he asked me, "Are you still enjoying fatherhood?" My answer was an emphatic yes.

I've been particularly conscious lately of just how worthwhile the difficult discipline of the second and third years has been. Now when I give Elisabeth a direction, I know that she will do it without the directive being repeated. When she disobeys, she knows that the way out is confession and repentance. It is the exception, rather than the rule, to hear a request not accompanied by please. And when she comes to me with a complaint about another child, I know that she has already tried to talk with the other child about it. All those things make fathering a delight.

So when we go to the playground and I see parents frustrated that their four-year-olds (not to mention the older kids) won't listen to them, I am all the more convinced that setting and enforcing clear expectations early has made parenting a joy for us, and has allowed Elisabeth to blossom.

Fun on the merry go round

2008-04-15T22:14:00.001-04:00

Dying Easter eggs with Uncle Frank

2008-04-09T09:13:00.001-04:00

Elisabeth had a fantastic time coloring eggs with Uncle Frank, and I failed to post any pictures . . . until now.

Hopscotch

2008-04-08T12:35:00.001-04:00

I was quite surprised to find that Elisabeth can no do the entire hopscotch board without extra little jumps!

I think I need some onion food

2008-04-08T11:56:00.006-04:00

On Monday, Elisabeth had her first filling. We went to the pediatric dentist a month or so ago, and were horrified to learn that she had several cavities. So we scheduled an appointment to have them filled as quickly as we could, and Monday was the big day. She was very brave, and the filling went really well, although her lip is swollen from the procedure.

On the way home we were talking about good foods to keep her tooth healthy and she announced,

"I think I need some onion food."

[She hates onions!]

Where did you get your name?

2008-04-07T14:45:00.003-04:00

Last night as I was putting Elisabeth to bed, she asked me,

"Daddy, where did you get your name?"

I asked her who she thought gave me my name. She guessed and aunt and uncle before settling on Granddaddy and Grandmummy. Of course, that prompted another question:

"Who gave Mommy her name?"

Again, I turned the question on her. The same aunt and uncle topped the list as Mommy's name-givers. But eventually she figured out that Pop-pop and Grandma had given Mommy her name.

After I had tucked Elisabeth in, she wanted Mommy to tuck her in as well, and continued the same line of questions:

"Mommy, where did you get my name?"

Mommy explained that we had chosen the name because it means devoted to God. Elisabeth persisted:

"But how did you know how to spell it; you know, E-L-I-S-A-B-E-T-H?"

We still have a little ways to go on teaching phonics . . .

The Call of Stories

2008-04-07T09:03:00.003-04:00

The Call of Stories is a powerful call to stories and through stories. Robert Coles, a pediatric psychiatrist and prolific author, writes brilliantly on the role that stories play in shaping character. He writes from the experience of teaching literature at Harvard to undergraduates, and in almost every one of Harvard's graduate schools. Time and again he recounts how stories affected his students in ways that challenged and changed them - in a way only stories can do.

Although Coles isn't dealing here with children's literature, the implications are clear. We engage in stories in a unique way, identifying with the characters, feeling outrage at wrong, and even coming to see our own hypocrisy. Stories, both oral and written, can and should play a significant role in the education, and moral and spiritual formation of children. To neglect great stories is to dispense with the most powerful and vital tool of education.

For parents interested in children's literature, this is an excellent book. I'll warn you in advance that for all its merits, the conclusion is decidedly lacking. Coles clearly perceives the powerful role that literature plays, but doesn't have a larger framework of purpose within which these forces make sense. Even with first rate insight, he comes up lacking because he doesn't see the ultimate purpose behind moral formation. However, for those who see that purpose, this book will be immensely helpful.

What is the 'earth'?

2008-04-03T12:13:00.002-04:00

Elisabeth asked a question about geography recently, and I began by answering, "We live on planet earth . . ."
She quickly interrupted me, "What is the earth?"
I explained that the earth is the planet on which we live.
She stopped me again, "What is a planet?"
I said, "It is shaped like a ball."
"Where we live is like a rectangle [meaning flat], not a ball!" she retorted.
Apparently I'm going to have to pull out the simple activities through which we see evidence that the earth is, in fact, a sphere. I love teaching science!

That's the book I was looking for

2008-03-26T09:00:00.004-04:00

I found a book of poetry in the "reading room" at our local public library, and immediately had to find out if they had the book in the lending collection. Favorite Poems Old and New is an anthology of excellent poetry for children that includes poems of Longfellow, Wordsworth, Keats, Kipling, Emerson, Eliot, and Dickenson among hundreds of others. After being so long frustrated with poorly written poetry for children, I was delighted to find an outstanding anthology of fun poetry!

Elisabeth's zoo

2008-03-26T08:59:00.001-04:00

Elisabeth has taken an interest in painting animals in the past month or so, and the collection of them has come to be referred to as "Elisabeth's zoo." It is amazing to me how her intrest in animals has helped her learn to control the brush far more than she does when painting free form.

The Easter Story

2008-03-26T08:39:00.004-04:00

Yesterday I read aloud Lilly's Big Day in Elisabeth's class. I also gave her teachers The Big Picture Story Bible to preview the sections on the Easter story. I explained that I wanted to be able to share with the class what Easter is about through a book written for children. I want them to understand that it isn't about bunnies and eggs.

After previewing the book, they declined (although the teacher's aid was riveted by The Big Picture Story Bible and I left it with her to read). It was a good reminder to me of where tolerance ends. As Lesslie Newbigin states:

"But if we are talking as the Bible talks about God, who is Creator and Governor of all things, who acts in specific ways, and whose purpose is the criterion for everything human, whether in the public or the private sectors, then there is an inevitable conflict." (Foolishness to the Greeks p67, emphasis mine)

The death and resurrection of Jesus call the entire modern world into question. I could not read it to the kids as a nice story (it can hardly be called 'nice'), or even merely a good piece of literature (and I think it is excellent children's literature). I would be reading it as the true story about the defining event in the history of the world - and that is a dividing line.

So I look forward to sitting with the teachers privately, away from the kids, and talking about this event that defines all of human existence. And I pray that the nonsense of the Gospel will penetrate their hearts, and give them life.

The end of an era

2008-03-21T10:02:00.001-04:00

Today Elisabeth had her first ever haircut!

Prayer of Confession

2008-03-18T10:23:00.003-04:00

On Sunday, I was struck by how true our opening prayer was:

Lord, some of us walk home on these streets,
and some of us call these streets home.
We are a community of struggle.
Some of us are rich people trying to escape loneliness.
Some of us are poor people trying to escape the cold.
Some of us are addicted to drugs, and others are addicted to money.
We are a broken people who need each other and God,
for we have come to recognize the mess that we have created of our world
and how deeply we suffer from that mess.

We come before you asking you to help us work together
to give birth to a new community within the shell of the old.
We believe that another world is possible.
We believe that another world is necessary.
We believe that another world is already here. Amen.

Palm Sunday

2008-03-17T16:33:00.002-04:00

I love holy week. Until yesterday, I had forgotten how much I love it.

At our Palm Sunday service, we began the service outdoors with the Gospel reading and then walked around the block singing worship songs. Where I live, that's just plain weird. It is more acceptable to be gay than to be Christian. I couldn't help but think that our procession was a proclamation of another reality that our culture treats as a myth.

When we returned to the steps of our church, we had a second reading outside the church. I knelt on the sidewalk next to Elisabeth as I heard these words:

'And when [Jesus] drew near and saw the city, he wept over it, saying, “Would that you, even you, had known on this day the things that make for peace! But now they are hidden from your eyes. For the days will come upon you, when your enemies will set up a barricade around you and surround you and hem you in on every side and tear you down to the ground, you and your children within you. And they will not leave one stone upon another in you, because you did not know the time of your visitation.”' (Luke 19:41-44)

I couldn't help but shudder at the phrase "you and your children within you" as I held Elisabeth. These are solemn and terrible and fearful words of our Lord.

We entered the chapel together and continued in worship, which included a lengthy dramatic reading of the betrayal and denial in which we, the congregation were the voice of the throng asking for Barabbas. When offered Jesus, we said, "Let him be crucified!" and "His blood be on us and on our children!" More shudders.

This is the reality of the crucifixion. It is not simply a nice "Bible story." It is a gut-wrenching tale of betrayal, denial, and death of the One who is utterly faithful and kind, who went willingly to the cross.

I love holy week not because it is full of happy feelings, but because in it I see the invincible love of Jesus over our sin by the cross. The heights of resurrection morning are more pronounced for having seen during the week our sinfulness over which he triumphed.

God's love and ours

2008-03-17T14:20:00.001-04:00

I love reading John Owen. I found this gem yesterday:

"The love of God is like himself - equal, constant, not capable of augmentation or diminution; our love is like ourselves - unequal, increasing, waning, growing, declining. His, like the sun, [is] always same in its light, though a cloud may sometimes interpose; ours, as the moon, has its enlargements and straightenings. (John Owen. Communion with the Triune God p120)

You're not a child!

2008-03-17T13:29:00.002-04:00

Elisabeth turned to me yesterday in worship and said,

"You're not a child!"

Several times when we have talked about being children of God, she has been confused and said, "You're not a child. You're a grown-up." Her perplexity is understandable. Where else do we ask grown-ups to be children? Yet this is precisely where I am humbled in her presence and have to say,

"The only way for Daddy to enter God's kingdom is to become like you. There is no room for grown-ups in the Kingdom. God only accepts people who receive His Kingdom like children. That's the way that I need to be a child - and the way that you need to stay a child."

New tumblon feed in the sidebar

2008-03-14T13:18:00.003-04:00

I'm going to be more actively blogging on the tumblon founders' blog on items that may be of interest to my readers here. So I've added a feed to the sidebar of this blog, or you can add it to your own feed reader here.

The great news is that before long, I'll migrate all of my blogging and photo sharing to tumblon! I'll let you know when that happens.

She's reading!

2008-03-11T13:27:00.003-04:00

This morning on the bus, Elisabeth and I looked at her latest issue of Highlights, which just arrived in the mail. It contains an array of simple poems, stories and visual puzzles for young children. One of the pages was a very simple, six-sentence story about a dog. I encouraged Elisabeth to sound out the words and read them.

She took the sounds one at a time, put them together, and read word after word! We kept reviewing the phrase of each 5-6 word sentence, because by the time she reached the last word, she had already forgotten what the first two words said, and had to sound them out again! However, I was amazed, because this is the first time that she has read a story. She has been decoding simple words for some time now, but hasn't shown interest in decoding even simple sentences - until today.

What a world of fun is just around the corner!

Unkindness of unbelief

2008-03-11T13:15:00.004-04:00

"'He himself loves you' . . . . Resolve of that, that you may hold communion with him in it, and be no more troubled about it. Yea, as your great trouble is about the Father's love, so you can no way more trouble or burden him, than by your unkindness in not believing it."

(John Owen Communion with the Triune God p109) I love reading Owen's writing because of sentences like that. In one sentence he captures how faith and love intertwine - and how unkind (and therefore wicked) it is not to believe God's great love for us.

"Chunky Cheese"

2008-03-10T12:40:00.002-04:00

Elisabeth looked forward with great anticipation to her first trip to "Chunky Cheese." (We tried consistently restating it as "Chuck E. Cheese" for her to hear the proper pronunciation, but she hasn't picked it up yet.) The highlight of the day was when she accidentally threw a ski ball into the pool of the water pistol game!

Wipe clean books

2008-03-10T09:41:00.001-04:00

Elisabeth received two wipe clean (dry erase) books for Christmas that we have been using frequently. This is one of the first times that she has written her name with only the first letter capitalized.

My parents' names

2008-03-07T08:59:00.002-05:00

Recently when Rebecca picked Elisabeth up from school, the teacher greeted her at the door and said,

"Today Elisabeth told me that her father's name is Graham, and her mother's name is Mommy."

Turn off my imagination

2008-03-03T07:56:00.004-05:00

Two nights ago Elisabeth was up frequently during the night. One of those times, she called me into her room and said to me,

"Daddy, can you stop my imagination?"

I smiled and said we could pray, and we did. Then she looked up at me and said,

"Can you turn off my imagination?"

We prayed again, as I tucked her in, and she was soon back to sleep.

Let the little children come

2008-02-28T16:40:00.004-05:00

Recently we have been listening to Hide 'Em in Your Heart. The first song on the CD is called "Let the little children come," and Elisabeth has been singing along like this:

"Let the little children come.
Let the little children come.
And do not forgive them.
And do not forgive them!"

We need to add the word forbid to her vocabulary so that the song makes sense.

Turn of phrase

2008-02-26T21:42:00.001-05:00

Recently Elisabeth was seated in the bathroom with the lights off and called out the door,

"Can someone turn off the dark?"

Hooray for snow!

2008-02-25T17:33:00.001-05:00

The snow (which has now melted from the railing entirely) brought Elisabeth great delight.

Web 2.0 parenting

2008-02-23T09:55:00.006-05:00

I have loved spending the past two and a half years with Elisabeth and watching her explore and develop on a daily basis. I have loved taking thousands of pictures and keeping this blog to be able to record our memories. Learning how she is developing, and finding appropriate ways to encourage and stretch her has been a delight.

As I spent hours perusing book lists, searching the shelves of libraries and bookstores, and wandering (mostly frustrated) through toy stores, I wondered if there was a service that told you what skills your child was currently developing, and recommended great books, toys and activities for each developmental stage - in short, a service to make parenting simple, so parents could spend more constructive time with their kids.

So I looked, and came up empty. There are lots of lists: lists of milestones, lists of books, lists of toys, and lists of activities. But no one had pioneered web 2.0 parenting, by providing parents a simple, customized, interactive environment to learn about and support each stage of their children's development.

At the same time, my childhood best friend, Jonathan, had seen that although parents (like me) take thousands of digital pictures, and there are many services for printing and sharing photos on the web, no one seemed to realize that the rate of computer replacement by home users would mean that parents needed a better and more reliable way to store their memories and photos for the long haul.

Thus tumblon was born. We could provide parents a simple, customized, interactive environment in which parents could learn how to support their child's current development and save those memories in stories, photos, and videos. It would be an interactive online 'baby book' so that grandparents (and other friends and family) could enjoy all the memories 24/7 - and for many, many years to come.

As an educator, I believe that parents are the key players in the education of children. I also believe that their greatest responsibility lies in the first five years of life (thought it certainly doesn't end there), as those early years mold the character, shape the personality, and even affect the intellectual capacity of children. So the prospect of creating a service that enabled parents to fulfill their responsibility, celebrate all of the milestones along the way and create a rich archive of memories is a dream come true.

In the not-so-distant future, that dream is going to come true when we launch tumblon. There is a teaser site up now, where you can sign up to learn more. And I'm posting on the founders' blog as we get closer to launch. Before too long, I'll start posting on my new tumblon blog, so you'll know that the transition has arrived, when this blog redirects you there!

Snow covered gloves

2008-02-23T09:04:00.001-05:00

Elisabeth's gloves are snow magnets.

Snow!

2008-02-22T10:52:00.002-05:00

It snowed again! So we took full advantage of playing in the snow (and will again later today).

Foolishness to the Greeks

2008-02-20T19:19:00.000-05:00

It is a rare thing for me to reread a book. I often return to a good book and reread passages from it, but I cannot remember when I last finished a book and picked it up to start reading it again from the beginning.

However, when I finished reading Foolishness to the Greeks, I returned to the beginning and started rereading. On my first encounter with Newbigin, I had to reread just to understand what he was saying because his paradigm was so different from mine. (I daresay my outlook was so syncretistic that I couldn't understand another Christian who didn't share my syncretisms.) Now that I've undergone a sort of Newbiginian revolution, I am reading voraciously to understand. In Foolishness to the Greeks, he explores this question in depth:

"What would it mean if, instead of trying to explain the gospel in terms of our modern scientific culture, we tried to explain our culture in terms of the gospel?" (p41)

In doing precisely that, he has completely upended my world view. My understanding of education, commerce, and the church have undergone a seismic shift.

"The former statement (i.e., that the tomb was empty) can be accepted as a fact only if the whole plausibility structure of contemporary Western culture is called into question." (p62)

In other words, "it is idle to suppose that any kind of peaceful coexistence is possible between these two ways of understanding history" (61). The truth of the good news of Jesus says that the modern Western vision (its plausibility structure) is not only inadequate; it is false because it claims to see truth. It is not merely an invitation to adopt a belief system. It is a call to conversion "in which the most real of all realities is the living God whose character is 'rendered' for us in the pages of Scripture" (64).

If you haven't recommend Newbigin, I highly recommend starting with Foolishness to the Greeks.

Snappy

2008-02-18T10:12:00.004-05:00

Elisabeth has developed a fascination with snapping. She practices snapping her fingers throughout the day, without any sort of encouragement. She has the motion now, and can make a soft snapping sound. I don't think it will be long before they're nice and loud.

Teaching Truthfulness

2008-02-15T20:10:00.002-05:00

A friend just sent me an article on Learning to Lie, which presents fascinating research on the rate of lying in children, and the reasons they lie. Two of their observations especially impressed me:

Parents teach their kids to lie. The way we confront infractions can incite a child to lie. If we burst out, "Did you do that?" a child is inclined to self-protect by lying. But we can be even more outright in our incitements to lie, particularly in how they respond to receiving and undesirable gift.
Lying is a pattern that builds. The author puts it this way:
Many parenting Websites and books advise parents to just let lies go—they’ll grow out of it. The truth, according to Talwar, is that kids grow into it. In studies where children are observed in their natural environment, a 4-year-old will lie once every two hours, while a 6-year-old will lie about once every hour and a half. Few kids are exceptions. (source, emphasis mine)
New York magazine is telling parents the dangers of letting their children lie! Now if we jump on the bandwagon because "studies prove . . ." that kids grow into lying, then we've missed the point. Research is behind the curve in parenting advice. Teaching your children not to lie, and modeling integrity, have been wise in every age and every place.

After reading this article, I was all the more grateful that Elisabeth regularly comes to me (unsolicited) and says, "Daddy, I did _____ [that was forbidden]." O how I would rather have an honest child who repents than a seemingly flawless child who is a liar!

Happy Valentine's Day!

2008-02-15T11:59:00.001-05:00

We're a day late, but a very happy Valentine's Day to all!

It snowed today!

2008-02-12T22:29:00.001-05:00

Children's Bible Stories

2008-02-12T22:14:00.004-05:00

I love The Big Picture Story Bible, but have been looking for an illustrated children's Bible that contained more Biblical stories so that Elisabeth would see more of the stories that fit into the Big Picture. I was sorely disappointed with the New Bible in Pictures for Little Eyes, which is probably only appropriate for children under 3 rather than the claimed age range of 4-7.

Happily, we received the Illustrated Family Bible Stories as a gift, and have found a middle ground children's Bible that is not overly simplistic, but still has ample illustrations.

The authors do a remarkably good job of summarizing the Biblical stories. Sometimes there is very little editing at all, and is simply the Biblical text. (I've noticed how well they have stuck to the text as I have been reading through Genesis and Exodus in my devotions at the same time that I have been reading those accounts to Elisabeth.) There have been a few occasions that I questioned the way that they simplified a story for children, but for the most part I'm impressed. So, if you're looking for something to give more of the stories than the Big Picture Story Bible, check this out.

Goldfish

2008-02-11T21:46:00.000-05:00

When I arrived at Elisabeth's school today, her teacher greeted me at the door. She asked Elisabeth to show me what she had done in school. She pointed to the word "goldfish" (clearly in her handwriting) on the bulletin board. The letters were well-formed, and I affirmed her work, thinking that was what we were observing. Elisabeth's teacher then explained that not only had she written the word, but she had spelled it by sounding it out. Previously, we had been working on words like "sit" and "bat", so "goldfish" is a major milestone!

Bach at bedtime

2008-02-07T21:04:00.000-05:00

In the quest for peaceful transitions to sleep, we have encouraged Elisabeth to listen to music while she goes to sleep. A week or two ago, I asked her if she would like to listen to Bach's cello suites while she went to sleep. She didn't protest, and drifted happily to sleep. The next night I asked her what music she wanted, and she requested Bach.

Now Bach is her regular request at bedtime. (I don't blame her. The cello suites are my current favorite as well!)

Ash Wednesday

2008-02-06T23:31:00.001-05:00

On Wednesday, when I picked Elisabeth up from school, she pointed at my forehead and asked, "What's that, Daddy?" I asked her to tell me what she saw, and what it looked like, and then we talked about the ashes and the cross. I told her that when our rector put the ashes on my forehead, he said, "Remember that you are dust and ashes; for you are dust and to dust you will return." And he prayed for me, that this would be a season of seeking, finding and resting in Jesus.

Elisabeth was intrigued, and I was delighted. It was a wonderful reminder to me of how vivid certain elements of worship can be to children. I remember her asking similar questions as we sat at the back of the Maundy Thursday service last year (at which there is a foot washing). All of the symbolic actions beg the question, "Why?!" When used purposefully and well, these actions tell the story of the Gospel, of our wickedness, and God's great love in Christ.

As we enter this season of Lent, I am deeply grateful for the symbols, and even more grateful for the Reality that they present. I'm excited to be attentive to what Elisabeth is seeing, hearing and experiencing so that I can impress this great good news through which the Holy Spirit gives new life.

That's what's SUPPOSED to happen at night

2008-02-06T11:03:00.001-05:00

Last night as I lay sleeping, I heard little footsteps padding into our room. I looked up and asked Elisabeth what was wrong. Without answering, she walked over to the tissues, took one, and padded back to her room. She climbed in bed, and that was the last noise I heard until 7:15am.

In my mind, that's what's supposed to happen in the middle of the night when a child needs something!

Why do you call me a 'drama queen'?

2008-02-04T10:14:00.003-05:00

Yesterday as we were preparing for church, Elisabeth was providing more than necessary resistance to the morning routine. Midway through Elisabeth's antics, she turned to Mommy and said,

"Why do you call me a 'drama queen'?"

I wonder if she will begin to recognize that those comments coincide with her dramatic statements and actions . . .

She walked home from school!

2008-02-01T07:47:00.000-05:00

We live about 2 miles from Elisabeth's preschool, and until now have used the stroller to walk to and from school. Last week, we had dinner with friends who have a daughter 10 months younger than Elisabeth who regularly walks 2 miles from their home to her school. Inspired by her stamina, I decided it was time to let Elisabeth try the walk.

On Tuesday, she walked all the way home - without a single complaint! Yesterday we tried it again on the way home, and I was the one trying to keep up with her. She would run ahead and stop for me to catch up, and then start sprinting again.

Needless to say, she sleeps well at night!

Imitating Ellsworth Kelly

2008-01-31T16:55:00.000-05:00

First, Elisabeth observed Ellsworth Kelly's work.

Then she created her own.

Is this healthy?

2008-01-30T13:25:00.000-05:00

Elisabeth has a recent fetish with healthy food. Before she puts (almost) anything in her mouth, she asks,

"Is this healthy?"

Thankfully the vast majority of the time, the answer is yes - so not only is she eating healthily, but she is learning to recognize a healthy diet. Her follow-on questions are more difficult:

"Why is it good for me?"

That question keeps me honest, and forces me to do some homework. (I recently learned that bell peppers are an excellent source of vitamin C.) Elisabeth is going to keep me healthy!

"I love you Daddy. You do good ponytails."

2008-01-30T10:20:00.000-05:00

For almost my entire life as a father, I have been known by my daughter as the one who hurts her when putting in ponytails. In my opinion, I have dramatically improved over the span of her life. (I think I was really bad at it for the first year or so that she had enough hair to gather into pigtails, and then a ponytail.) However, I retained my distinction as the one who hurts her head.

So this morning I was shocked when Elisabeth came out of her room, climbed onto my lap on the couch and said,

"I love you Daddy. You do good ponytails."

That is a major milestone for me!

All smiles

2008-01-29T11:06:00.000-05:00

Packed up and ready to go

2008-01-28T22:10:00.000-05:00

We have two friends who have recently given birth to children with congenital heart defects. One child has hypoplastic left heart, and is about six months old, and the other has trisomy 18 (one of the effects of which is hypoplastic left heart). It has been hard and good to love and pray for these families as they love their children.

The second family, the Fahmers, know that their son's time is likely very short; only 5% of children with their son's condition live past their first birthday. They have started a blog about their experiences, which I hope will bring Light to parents of terminally ill children - and parents of healthy children.

Last night as Rebecca and I talked about these two hard situations, I thought of J.I. Packer's words in his introduction to A Quest for Godliness: The Puritan Vision of Christian Life:

"[T]he Puritans have taught me to see and feel the transitoriness of this life, to think of it, with all its richness, as essentially the gymnasium and dressing-room where we are prepared for heaven, and to regard readiness to die as the first step in learning to live . . . . [T]heir medicine and surgery were rudimentary; they had no aspirins, tranquillisers, sleeping tablets or anti-depressant pills, just as they had no social security or insurance; in a world in which more than half the adult population died young and more than half the children died in infancy, disease, distress, discomfort, pain and death were their constant companions. They would have been lost had they not kept their eyes on heaven and known themselves as pilgrims traveling home to the Celestial City. . . . Few of us, I think, live daily on the edge of eternity in the conscious way that the Puritans did, and we lose out as a result. For the extraordinary vivacity, even hilarity (yes, hilarity; you will find it in the sources), with which the Puritans lived stemmed directly, I believe from the unflinching, matter-of-fact realism with which they prepared themselves for death, so as always to be found, as it were packed up and ready to go. Reckoning with death brought appreciation of each day's continued life, and the knowledge that God would eventually decide, without consulting them, when their work on earth was done brought energy for the work itself while they were still being given time to get on with it. (pp 13-14 emphasis mine)

I think families like the Fahmers can be contemporary Puritans to us, helping us to live daily on the edge of eternity, "packed up and ready to go," whether we and our children are robust and healthy, or terminally ill. May God grant us grace to see His face and live with vivacity, hilarity and energy while He gives us breath.

Trip to the zoo

2008-01-28T21:37:00.000-05:00

We enjoyed a visit to the birds (indoors) on a chilly winter day.

The subversive act of prayer

2008-01-28T16:33:00.000-05:00

We are blessed in this season of life, with many wonderful friends. For the first time in our lives, several of those close friends are not Christians. As we frequently invite friends to join us in our home for meals, I'm forced to cross a new bridge: how/if to give thanks to Christ for food before we eat. In general, I explain our practice of praying before meals to our guests, and ask if they would permit me to pray before we eat. So far we haven't met with refusal, but it has opened my eyes to how subversive that action is.

In praying to God through Christ before we eat, we are speaking with the living God in front of people who don't know Him, who are by nature (as we were) enemies of God. We are bowing before the One to whom we owe our very existence, when our guests may not acknowledge His existence. Furthermore, if I was invited into the home of a friend who invoked another god before sharing a meal with us, I could not, in good conscience, participate. But that is exactly what I am doing in inviting our guests to pray with us: to participate in speaking to God in Christ.

If I am not mistaken, that 'small' action is potentially very threatening (in both good and bad ways) to our guests. We are calling them to acknowledge a Reality that they deny, by humbly pausing before Him. Regardless of their religion, prayer challenges the most basic assumptions of what is, and what is real. And that can be very threatening - in a way that causes people to clam up in fear, or in a way that opens the door to authentic, transparent communication about the Gospel.

I am finding that in crossing that culture gap, particularly with friends who have young children, it is wise and helpful to invite them to join us, to explain what I'm about to do (so it doesn't seem hokey-pokey, or ritualistic), and to pray - and silently pray that the Spirit would awaken them to the glory of Christ.

Don't do "__________"

2008-01-28T16:28:00.000-05:00

Over the past several weeks, Elisabeth has developed a new mannerism. She now frequently tells us what she is not allowed to do, and in doing so demonstrates the proscribed behavior. It is not uncommon for her, without prompting, to say:

"We don't bang our forks on the table" (while shaking her head "no" and banging her fork on the table.

It is all that we can do as parents not to burst out laughing, because it almost never follows on us asking her not to do the particular behavior. It is as if she brainstorms all the actions that she knows she should not do, and then proceeds to tell us (always with demonstration) what would be inappropriate to do at that particular time.

I'm glad that she understands our expectations, and am ready for her to outgrow this mannerism.

Sketching

2008-01-25T10:57:00.000-05:00

Elisabeth's artistic abilities have skyrocketed over the past three months or so. She's gone from mostly unintelligible scribbling to writing her own name, several other names, and several familiar words, and drawing pictures that can easily be recognized. This week at her museum class, they looked at Willem de Kooning's work. Elisabeth's sketch was decidedly more representational than de Kooning's.

It's good to be back where I belong

2008-01-21T19:33:00.000-05:00

Yesterday we visited Uncle Gordon with Elisabeth's Granddaddy and Grandmummy (who were visiting for the weekend). At the end of a long day, as Rebecca was tucking Elisabeth into bed, Elisabeth looked up and said,

"It's good to be back where I belong."

It is hard to know whether she was speaking of home, or bed.

She doesn't like shots

2008-01-18T23:40:00.001-05:00

Today Elisabeth went to the doctor for some immunizations. On the way to the doctor's office, Mommy explained that after their visit they would pick out a treat. Elisabeth quickly replied,

"Don't tell me that!"

Clearly she knew that treats were connected to the endurance of undesirable pricks in the doctor's office.

However, she kept up a brave face throughout the visit until the needles emerged. Then, crying after having received the first shot, she said through her tears:

"I'm crying because I didn't get to finish my painting in art today!"

Where does she come up with these?!

Flashback from pre-blogging days

2008-01-18T22:07:00.000-05:00

On April 29, 2006 I wrote:

"I sat Elisabeth on my lap to talk about disobedience.
She said, 'May I have a chocolate after our conversation?'"

On April 5, I recorded:

"Carrying Elisabeth, I asked her to walk.
She replied, 'I don't want to walk.'
'Why?' I asked.
She answered, 'Sometimes I walk into things.'"

I love recalling and laughing over those days!

Poetic license

2008-01-14T19:46:00.000-05:00

Tonight we covered the thirty-fourth question in the catechism:

What is not keeping God's law?
Not being or doing what God requires. Luke 10:31

We practiced it with Elisabeth by asking her, "What is not keeping God's law?"
She replied:

"Not being or doing what God acquires."

I tried to explain, "The word is requires, not acquires." To this she returned,

"But I like it better!"

I think that is where poetic license distorts meaning . . .

Seminary of Church and State

2008-01-12T18:58:00.000-05:00

"A family is the seminary of Church and State. If children are not well principled at home, then everything miscarries! A error in the first mixture is not mended in the second! If youth are ill-bred in the family, then they will be ill-mannered in Church and society. It is in the home where making or marring of one's character first takes place, which early character is the early presage of their future lives (Proverbs 20:11)." [Thomas Manton, quoted in The Family Worship Book p109]

I find it hard to disagree. Therefore there little more important to Church or society than to equip and hold parents responsible for this high duty.

Coloring in the Met

2008-01-11T14:47:00.000-05:00

Aidan, Molly and Elisabeth during Art Class

My Days . . . My Pictures

2008-01-11T10:55:00.001-05:00

Elisabeth received a brilliant gift for Christmas called My Days . . . My Pictures. It is a small spiral-bound drawing pad that has a prompt for each day of the year, such as: Draw a picture of yourself. Not only is it fun because there is something new to do every day, but parents can see incremental progress over the course of weeks, months and the entire year. We have noticed changes just within the first eleven days of using it (a great witness to the power of practice!).

One of the prompts in the first week was Draw your Dad. Elisabeth has decided that all the people she draws need to have either a pony tail (on top in a bunch) or pig tails. So, notwithstanding the fact that I don't have long hair, Elisabeth announced:

"I'm drawing Daddy with pigtails!"

I expressed my consternation, and Elisabeth changed her course:

"I'm giving Daddy dreads!"

I hope that the pictures of me eleven months from now will be a closer approximation of my actual appearance.

How good were they?

2008-01-10T22:09:00.001-05:00

Tonight we covered the thirty-first question in our catechism:

Were Adam and Eve good when God made them?

The catechism's answer is:

Yes, very good. All that God made was good. Genesis 1:31.

After reciting it several times, Rebecca asked Elisabeth, "Were Adam and Eve good when God made them?"

Elisabeth replied, "Yes."

Not securing the full answer, Mommy asked, "How good?"

"As good as us," Elisabeth replied.

2 years ago

2008-01-10T20:01:00.000-05:00

Our 60+ degree weather sure is different from this snow storm
(Elisabeth at 2 years old looking out into Brooklyn)

Early lessons

2008-01-10T07:20:00.000-05:00

"Let us look upon every brother who tries or vexes us as God's means of grace, God's instrument for our purification - an opportunity for our exercise of the humility Jesus our Life breathes within us." (Andrew Murray in Humility)

I tend to think of these kinds of insights as only for adults, but they are not. If we teach our children these lessons early, they will be less tried and vexed - and more happy and free. The great challenge of parenting, as I see it, is to communicate these things in language that 3 and 4 year olds can understand - and to manifest the reality in our own lives.

Come Ye Sinners

2008-01-08T21:12:00.000-05:00

Recently we have begun including singing in our family worship time (despite the fact that I still can't play the guitar). Our CD player does a much better job than I could.

We started out using one of the songs from the Seeds of Praise album, Praise the Lord (from Psalm 148). I thought that this would be a good fit for Elisabeth as it is Scripture set to upbeat music. However, after about a week of Praise the Lord, she picked up one of my CDs, Indelible Grace, and asked if we could sing Come Ye Sinners, a great old hymn set to new music.

So for the last week or so, we have been singing Come Ye Sinners every night, while Elisabeth follows along the lyrics with her finger. That experience has made me even more grateful for rich hymns and the context that they give to explain and impress the truth of the Gospel. Each verse is an exposition of that great and glorious truth: "not the righteous, not the righteous; sinners Jesus came to call."

What better way to plant the great truths of the Gospel than through song?

Seven-oh-zero

2008-01-07T13:15:00.000-05:00

For the past several days, Elisabeth has been getting up long before sunrise, and wanting the attention of her parents. She knows that seven o'clock is the time to wake up, and she has a digital clock in her room so that she doesn't have to ask us if it is time yet. So yesterday (clearly already awake), she triumphantly said,

"It is seven oh zero!"

Today was even better. She slept right past seven!

Sleeping troubles

2008-01-05T17:03:00.000-05:00

After a wonderful season of going to bed at 7pm and rising at 7am, Elisabeth is waking in the night. Some of her memorable lines from the past two nights:

"There are tigers in my room."

"Can shadows bite?"

Skating

2008-01-05T14:04:00.000-05:00

Last year Elisabeth was able to stand on skates on the ice without falling. This year she's skating forward!

Childhood is brief

2008-01-04T14:43:00.000-05:00

"Childhood is brief, and without some guidance a child may miss what is quality reading and never discover the pleasure of a well-written book" (Gladys Hunt in Honey for a Child's Heart).

One of the consequences of the current ease of printing is that there are many children's books in print that are simply not worth reading. So when teachers say, "The most important thing you can do is read with your child," (like I did), that is only half of the story. If you go the library and take a book at random, it is likely that it is not good literature - if my public library is any measure. As Hunt says, "That's why book lists are helpful." Giving parents a book list provides a shortcut to books that will capture their imaginations and their hearts, and give them a hunger to devour really good children's literature. Once the cycle is begun, it tends not to need as much encouragement. If the first venture to the library is met by books that are less than captivating, then it is likely that the parent will pick up the remote control and turn on the television rather than traipsing out to the library again.

One such list is Jim Trelease's. Gladys Hunt also has a wonderful list in Honey for a Child's Heart.

Bad parents

2008-01-04T08:18:00.000-05:00

"I cannot suppose that you are such a stranger in England as to be ignorant of the general complaint concerning the decay in the power of godliness, and especially of the great corruption of youth. Wherever you go, you will hear men crying out about how bad youth are. But indeed the source of the problem must be sought a little higher: it is bad parents that make bad children! We cannot blame children so much for their unruliness, for the greater weight of the blame lies in our own negligence in their education." (Thomas Manton, Epistle to the Reader of the Westminster Confessions of Faith and Larger and Shorter Catechisms, reprinted in The Family Worship Book p109)

It appears from Manton's comments (circa 1647), that the problem of parenting is not a new one, and that then, as now, society was slow to locate responsibility with parents for the education and formation of their children. So his statement is very bold: "it is bad parents that make bad children!" I dare say it is more bold now than then to make such a claim, but no less true. Further, I think that his approach is right not to point the finger at others, but to frame it as confession: "the greater blame lies in our own negligence in their education."

Nor did Manton stop with confession and wallowing in the bad condition of parenting. The Epistle was bound with the Westminster Confession and the Larger and Shorter Catechisms, because he was convinced that the application and use of these by parents was the remedy for their situation. I think we would do well to learn from him on all three levels: acknowledging the failure of parenting, confessing our sin, and repenting by taking hold of the resources provided for the instruction of our children.

The Family Worship Book

2008-01-04T07:30:00.000-05:00

Before reading Family Driven Faith, I hadn't thought much about the difference between family devotions and family worship. Voddie Baucham primed the pump so that when someone offered to buy me a book for Christmas, I knew precisely what kind of book I wanted. Through some helpful reviews on Amazon, I found The Family Worship Book, which I am pleased to commend just as strongly as they did.

For those who are unconvinced of the importance not merely of Biblical instruction in the home, but of regular family worship, this book provides a helpful and brief overview of why Christians in generations past have considered it indispensable. The author, Terry Johnson, is quite forthright in tracing his heritage to the Westminster Confessions and Catechisms - and provides explanation for why he leans on them so heavily (which you will probably see popping up in my quotables in the days to come). I think his argument is compelling for those who are already sensitive to the issues (as I was), and I think would be very challenging to someone who has not considered the responsibilities of family worship.

Many books are good at casting vision without providing any practical resources for doing so, and I am pleased to say that such is not the case with The Family Worship Book. The author is diligent to outline what he sees as the important elements of family worship, and then offers a sample liturgy for how to conduct family worship. In addition, he includes:

two catechisms, sans proof texts (including the Westminster Shorter Catechism)
a great list of hymns and psalms (sadly without scores, although he recommends several CDs that have numerous of the psalms and hymns on them)
a list of 50 important passages for memorization (including great OT texts)
a family reading record that uses a harmonization approach for reading with young children
a great selection of Scriptures for call to worship, and confession (reprinted, so you don't have to look them all up)
the Apostles', Nicene, and Westminster creeds
and a recommended pattern for introducing (and reviewing) psalms/hymns, memorization passages, and the creeds.

With a few bookmarks, this is a rich resource for beginning to practice family worship rather than just talking about its importance. I haven't yet found a better book to call and equip parents to lead their families in fellowship with Christ.

Core curriculum

2008-01-03T21:32:00.000-05:00

Is it or is it not the case that every human being exists for the joy of eternal fellowship with God and must face the possibility of missing that mark, forfeiting that prize? If it is the case, it ought to be part of the core curriculum in every school. It will not do to say that the determination of character by the structure of the DNA molecule is a fact that any child must learn to understand, but that the determination of all proper human purposes for the glory of God is an opinion that anyone is free to accept or reject. The question of which is the real word simply cannot be permanently evaded. There can be no genuinely missionary encounter of the gospel with our culture unless we face these questions. (Lesslie Newbigin Foolishness to the Greeks p67)

I love reading Newbigin. He has the ability to make clear what our culture sees as murky - and helps me think though what is involved in raising children to see that DNA can describe a great many things, but cannot explain them by giving them purpose.

Ice Skating

2008-01-03T20:55:00.000-05:00